There's some water on the floor of the passenger seat. I suspect it's a clogged drain under the cold air intake for the climate control system. This is based on some research and the fact that my car was parked under a tree and was completely covered in leaves for almost two months on a daily basis. While I believe I can disassemble it, I lack access to compressed air, a power washer, or some other high-pressure solution in order to unclog things.
Anyone around Portland have access to something and could lend a hand? I'm willing to drive up to an hour if necessary.