"The smarter you get, the funnier I am."
-- me (annual first day of physics class lecture)
"Assholes are like Easter Eggs, they come in every color you can imagine, and no matter how carefully hidden they are, they eventually start to stink up the place just to get noticed."
-- my dad
"Hotdogs are actually vegetables."
-- Albert Einstein, said to his vegetarian sister Maya who enjoyed a good sausage once in awhile.
"Anyone who believes that there is a conflict between science and religion doesn't understand either subject."
Prof. Eugene Allen Grim
"Science tells us how; religion tells us who."
Prof. Grim